I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I'm having to shit out rocks
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