i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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