i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
