this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
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