He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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