brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
