me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Randomize
