i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
