My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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