We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
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