She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
