billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Randomize
