walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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