sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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