Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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