This is not my ceiling
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize