eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
