Don't you send me to vm
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize