i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize