It's like God shit irony all over that family
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
this must be what syphilis tastes like
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
