My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I believe in your delicious
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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