don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
