He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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