man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
babies were throwing up all over the place
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
