I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
