Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
