Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
being pregnant is like rehab
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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