While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
