is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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