i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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