Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
