The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
She has the best kind of daddy issues
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
