Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize