My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize