He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Everything about him screamed your future.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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