You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
