he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
