apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
my liver is dry heaving
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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