That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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