I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Randomize
