i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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