He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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