you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
