yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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