Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
