I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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