You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Randomize
