I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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