I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
