Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
